I’m so glad I found you. Don’t ever leave me.

I hate change. It makes me anxious and sad and the thought of too much change makes me want to eat my weight in chocolate chip animal crackers. But sometimes change is unavoidable and actually good. /// After 7 years of being in a happily committed but long distance relationship, my boyfriend and I finally decided to get married. Over the next year, I’ll have to sell or give away two thirds of my belongings, bid a tearful farewell to my single gal condo, and merge fully and completely with the kind, interesting, currently brown-bearded man with whom I hope to spend the rest of my life (assuming we don’t destroy each other over the exact hue of our bathroom towels). /// I made this card a few years into our relationship and though it sounds like the battle cry of someone with abandonment issues, it actually speaks to a more universal truth: that really awesome people who “get” you (and love you for who you really are) are really hard to find. Really. /// The card’s sentiment may have been written originally for my guy, but I also feel this way about my sister, my oldest friends from high school, my roommate from college, and my few and curated besties from life after organized education. /// They are my people. They get me and I get them and we get each other. /// The hard part is when change threatens these relationships. The future looms, scary and unknown, and the hand you need to hold may not be right there, just a quick car ride away. Moving 50 miles away can feel like 500. /// I have to remind myself that distance, a new marriage, life, etc. may stretch the boundaries of my relationships but it won’t break them. We got here through thick and thicker (and sometimes, miraculously, thinner) and our traditions and secret handshakes won’t change just because of a change in zip code. I am holding on to these special friendships with a death grip. /// My big change is made easier knowing that I will actually be moving closer to some of my people, physically, though emotionally we were never that far apart. No matter where change has taken me in the past, I have managed to find my people, and I know I will never leave them. Really.

I know it sucks to gain weight. But, generally speaking, it is better to be fat than dead.

It’s summertime; that fun time of year when wearing less is more comfortable (and sometimes required) and more of you is bared to the world. I’ve always had a weight problem and somewhere around my college years, when I was, ironically, on the smaller end of my spectrum, I made a sign for our dorm wall that said, “It’s better to be fat than dead.” It was true then and it is ever so true now. /// The older you get, the more you realize that compared to other health issues like fighting cancer or, say, having a stroke, carrying around some extra “junk in the trunk” isn’t the end of the world. That said, my “end” had been getting bigger so I decided to go on a diet. /// My friend Evelyn suggested I use an app on my phone to track my calories and exercise. To be perfectly honest, I set up my goals with persistent cheating in mind:  I told the app that I wanted to lose 1.5 lbs per week with the aim of eating less calories than losing 1 lb per week. My reasoning? I need to be able to eat 14 barbeque chips if the serving size is 12 and still lose weight. Something in my personal happiness meter is tied up in eating more than the official serving size, rebelling against an “appropriate” quantity. I need to cheat, eat outside the box…or directly from the box sometimes…without dire consequences. /// I need freedom…and space to move around and run and fall and dance and cry and stretch and risk and sleep. I need flexibility and balance and experiences that open my mind. Nature (genetics?) also thinks I need extra padding on my body to protect me from life’s sharp edges and disappointments and stress. /// That padding, my friends, is made from extra chips…and just a couple big fat Jersey blueberries that are begging to be eaten and maybe just one extra dark chocolate, sea salt and turbinado sugar covered almond.  It is definitely better to be fat than dead.

Welcome to the new SBD Cards blog! Here I will post the stories of each card’s origin as well as humorous or interesting things I see/find/hear in the world around me. And maybe some other stuff that’s apropos to nothing. Why not? Let’s begin!